Right before thanksgiving arrived and us Americans ate way too much food, a little diddy hit the youtube airwaves. “It’s Thanksgiving” has been talked about as the new friday and for good reason. It’s made by the same guy, the same company! Ark Music Factory. Same people who made other songs I’ve posted like “Hysterical” and “Girl Swag” and “FRIDAY.” So now they’ve released their newest plague into the world. Let’s investigate.
Nicole Westbrook – It’s Thanksgiving
I am aware it is after thanksgiving but that doesn’t make this song any less terrible.
Thanksgiving Is Giving Is An Odd Choice
When writing a song about any holiday its hard not sound cliched or cheesy. This song fairs no better but Thanksgiving is an odd choice. There’s not a lot to Thanksgiving unless you want to go into its history (BORING) and you can hear that in the verse of the song.
First Verse, I’m wide awake. And I should take. A step and say thank you, thank you.
The things you’ve done. And what you did. Oh yeah. Uuu, yeah.
So we’ve gotten that out of the way. Be thankful for stuff. The Yeahs are some serious filler (OR STUFFING. HA!) because the writer couldn’t think of anything else to say. The second verse is pretty much the same thing. And that’s because there isn’t a lot to say about thanksgiving. Twice the song reminds people what holidays proceed and follow Thanksgiving. I feel like Thanksgiving, while an important American holiday, it’s the least thought about. It’s Christmas but without presents and more pumpkin pie. That sentence there would’ve made a better verse.
She talks about how she’s thankful but never gives any specifics during the verses or choruses. “Thank you, All the things you’ve done.” How sincere. There could be a little bit more. Or she could autotune about why it’s her favorite holiday but I still can’t think of how this beats ANY OTHER HOLIDAY!
Same Ish, Different Day
A truly original Thanksgiving chorus! So we get to the chorus and it’s FRIDAY all over again. (More like thursday, amirite?)
Nicole Westbrook: It’s Thanksgiving ergo we are guaranteed a good time. There will be food. Yay.
Rebeca Black: It’s Friday ergo we are guaranteed a good time. There will be party. Yay.
I’ll admit the lyrics are marginally different but it’s essentially the same thing.
Rap Because You Can
It wouldn’t be a song about Thanksgiving without a rap right? Sigh… Really the only reason I can figure there’s a rap is because Friday had a rap and the guy who wrote this song…
…is incredibly unoriginal. I dare say that the only reason he’s not doing the rapping is because everyone called him a pedophile when he did it in FRIDAY. I would say it feels out of place but it’s terrible, the song is terrible, so it fits.
She also mentioned ribs and then we see turkeyman/song writer eating them. Now call me old fashioned but I thought people ate turkey at Thanksgiving? Why mention ribs exclusively during the rap? I’m guessing he wanted to eat ribs so he wrote the line so during the filming he could have some. This is all conjecture but I wouldn’t put it past one of the worst song writers in history.
WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT THIS? I have a couple theories
1) The Westbrooks some how never heard “Friday” but heard AMF was a reputable way to get your kid into the music world. If they’d never heard friday, clearly their information gathering skills aren’t very good.
2) The Westbrooks heard Friday and wanted a more festive version. They’re also idiots.
3) The Westbrooks hate music and their kid make the worst song ever so she’ll be hated for it. Why? So she’ll grow up and be a lawyer or doctor or some other unfun job.
I can hardly believe it. One year ago at 3:03 in the morning, I posted “I don’t want to be a crappy blog” on to the internet and that started everything. Since then I’ve made some new friends, shared my love of awful with people around the world, and found more terrible music then I thought existed. I’ve had an awesome time writing Romantic Sir and I’m looking forward to seeing what the next year has in store for it.
So to celebrate, here’s a quick little video I made.
People who want people to be happy are the scum of the Earth. And not in a genuine caring sort of sense but in a “you should just be happy.” The people that tell you “Whatever it is, it can’t be that bad” while you’re just getting home from your mother’s funeral. The people who say “lemme see a smile” after you realize you have no way to pay your mounting debt. Also there are pedophiles. They’re terrible too. So what’s worse then those things? A combination of the two.
Chico – It’s Chico Time
Based on the chorus, Chico just wants us to relax. Taking life too serious will make you delirious, which is clearly a bad thing.
Syria, It’s Chico time. Stop taking things so serious. You’ll get delirious.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting people to be happy but saying “don’t take things serious” is insensitive when you provide no words of comfort or understanding. It’s the same reason you want to punch the person that tells you to cheer up after putting your dog down. Heck, I’m in a pretty good mood and I still want to hit this guy.
I’m not going to say Chico is a pedophile but he doesn’t make a very good case against it. Check out the lyrics of the first verse and pre-chorus
Sometimes it feels so good,
I can’t remember bad
Well that could be a lot of things. Like tennis? People like tennis right?
My inner clock is tickin’
And in fact it drives me mad
Well inner clock generally has to do with knowing what time it is without a clock. Or when a women decides “ermahgerd, neerd behrbehr” (oh my goodness, need baby). It’s driving him mad. So Chico what does chico want?
It’s erotic, exotic, hypnotic, that’s for sure
Sex. Is this even up for debate?
Put a smile on your face, take you to a place
you’ve never been before
Alright, nothing wrong with wanting sex and referring to taking someone to someplace they’ve never been before. Usually it refers to being an amazing love maker. Or having sex with a virgin. And there are a ton of kids on set…
NO CHICO NO CHICO NO!
This doesn’t mean he’s into kids in that way but it does feel like poor taste to have a verse about sex and have kids all over the place.
Also, tell he isn’t saying “Shake it naughty, c’mon baby fuck my body” at 1:47 seconds while dancing next to kids. He even steals one’s hat. According to the website I found the lyrics on he actually says “Shake it, lawdy
Come on baby, funk my body.” Funk? Really?
The nanite threat is spreading around the world and only our brave heroes can stop it! How? Well apprently it involves helping batman Black Panther. Will our brave heroes pull through or will they be sucked into the fold? Watch to find out!
A big part of writing a pop song is making the lyrics memorable. This is why most lyrics coming out of your radio are so dumbed down, repetitive and annoying. Even songs like “Someone That I Used To Know” By Gotye have that chorus people can remember which is good because I don’t think anyone knows the verse. But there is taking it too far. Sure people will remember you if you have insanely repetitive lyrics but the memory might not be the fondest.
Cheeky Girls – Cheeky Song
IT’S GOT SUBTITLES SO YOU CAN SING ALONG! I highly recommend it.
2002- 2004: The Age Of Cheeky Terror According to wikipedia, this song and the album it was did pretty well. At it’s peak, it was number 2 on the singles chart in the UK and number 6 in Japan and China. The song got to that point in China as it was frequently played to drive people off the streets in times of protest. That information may or may not be found on wikipedia.
The song clearly isn’t long lasting as I’d never heard of it til a friend went “Hey check out this terrible song.” But maybe there is something to be said for writing a terribly repetitive song like this because I’m writing this in total silence and I can still hear the song going in my head. Were I a lesser goon, I would go out and buy the album just in the hopes that by listening I could get it out of my head.
Cheeky Girls still do stuff. They were even on Brittan’s Got Talent which is cool. I guess. I don’t watch television that isn’t on netflix so I don’t know if that’s something prestigious or something they do at a high school every now and then. Does the winner get tatter tots for life? Does England even have tatter tots? These are the questions that keep me up at night.
Touch Your Bum?
Let’s not and say we didn’t. These are lyrics.
The song is actually called “Cheeky Girls (Touch My Bum)” which makes me wonder if that had something to do with its success. If so, I am sad for humanity.
THIS IS LIFE! I’ve been yelling this at people since I heard this song. It’s really the high point of the song if I do say so myself. The verse is the second highest point in the song, which I guess is a bit of an honor. They don’t spend much time here which is sad because it’s the only escape from the words “CHEEKY (GENDER)!” Still, the verse is pretty painful to go through.
never ever ask
where do you go
- I mean you don’t know me so that’d be weird if you did.
never ever ask
what do you do
- Well I mean you could ask if you wanted to make a conversation at a bus stop less awkward.
never ever ask
whats in your mind
- I’m not sure if this is a bad translation. If not, while technically “what’s on your mind” is a silly question, “what’s in your mind” makes me think something else is inhabiting it other then my mind. ALIEN!
never ever ask
if you’ll be mine
- So she doesn’t want a serious relationship with her bum toucher. Ke$ha would be proud.
don’t ask why
don’t be shy
touch my bum
THIS IS LIFE!
- Nope. Whole point of the article is me asking why. And why do you follow up touch my bum with “this is life”? You girls must be very creepy to go clubbing with. Gawd forbid they whisper it.
Ever wanted to break your super friends out of prison? What about fighting nanite infested prisoners? Well today our heroes Cranpage, Wolfgang, Escabar (paul), and Captain Backfire live that dream! Hilarity ensues
There’s a lot of preparation that goes into Halloween. The buying the costume, making things, figuring what slutty version of some child’s story you want to be, etc. While I was gathering my costume up, I found a few things that seemed a little odd and I thought I’d show them off. Sorry if the pictures aren’t the best, I had to use my camera phone.
A police club. A standard if you want to dress as a police officer. The club isn’t so much the problem as much as the BURNING PEOPLE IN THE BACKGROUND. And the officer is just smiling.
Sticking in the same area as the last picture, it’s a Nurse’s Baton… Wait.
John Wayne, known for being uncomfortable during pictures.
OH AWESOME! AN AVENGERS PUMPKIN CARVING KIT! SWEET NOW I CAN… Wait a minute. There’s nothing Avengers-y at all about this. It’s just regular pumpkin carving tools in Avengers packaging. MOM! BUY THIS FOR ME!!!!!!
In today's digital age where we pick and choose what we want to listen to on our ipod machines, some of us may have forgotten how bad music can be. Here lies a collection of the worst of the worst, from today's music to oldies but baddies, welcome to the Romantic Sir
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